GLOSSARY - 1
GlibLinguisticsOfferingSemanticShenanigans
AkaRandomYammering
SuperNaturalBeing
Selfishness
BeforeCrossOfSelf
BeliefInDivinity
SomeHopefullytHelpfulOperationalDefinitions
basedon puzzlepieces found inmy adloescentmisunderstandings
of Lutherandogma. Then cut&filed tofit my youngadult
misunderstandings of human developmentaltheory.
Also discardingpuzzlepieces(poems)
nolonger bestfit for understanding COSTofSelf.
(COST = CellularOriginSymptomsTreatment)
God - 1. an easytovisualize locusofcontrol over allbeing
2. refugeforself fearingdeath desiring eternalife
trinity - heuristicdevice introducing ElementalBeing as eternaltransform
in three developmentalstages (b+) BeforeTheCrossOfSelf (selfishness) = SuperNaturalBeing = Divinity
(+) OnTheCrossOfSelf (selfconsciousness) = SupraNaturalBeing = Duality
(+b) BeyondTheCrosssOfSelf (lesself) = SimplyNatural = Reality
as ElementalBeing
1. GodFather - a. being BeforeTheCrossOfSelf (b+)
b. comfortable image offering protection now & perfection later
c. startingplace forsearcher certainofdivinity as eternalifeguardian
d. omniomni icon of sapien desire&defense
e. notmyfather hisdonfidence havingbeencrushed by hisfather
then driventodrink by bipolardemons
2. GodSon - a. being OnTheCrossOfSelf (+)
b. personification of needforsearcher to takeon sin(separation)
&suffer oncross of selfhood untilbreaing
c. guarantee of lifeverlasing in resurrection
d. model of (not substitute for) needtotrain
3. GodSpirit - a. being BeyondTheCrossOfSelf (+b)
b. conceptualization of self'sdesire for personaleternalife
within perfectionofheaven
c. promiseofsurvival from transform's thoughtindignity
of returningborrowedelements &freeing sun'senergy ("dying")
CROSS = CruelReificationOfSecondarySentience (where secondarysentience = memory = self)
1. barrier to realitybeyondbelief
2. developmentalstage of embracingobjectivety/reason/truth
which mustbeovercome inorderto realize reality ineach thisnow
beforecross - 1. untrainedsapien exhibiting selfishbehaviors
(b+) 2. sapien overwhelmed by memoriesofpain seekingtosatedesire &defendself
3. playgroundbasketball no teamwork noD allme
Allother as enemy notfriends neverfamily.
oncross - 1. sapien facingself&selfishness feelingneed to train
(+) 2. sufferingseparation causedby Divinity&Duality
3. facing lifedeath without belief faithope purposemeaning
4. trying to rightallwrongs through reasoned&wellintentioned actions
5. beginningtraining to stillself
6. playingchalktalkbasketball studyingplays movingmechanically
Playmates as opponents as enemy. Teammates asfriends.
beyondcross - 1. intimation of lesseparation (morelove) within constantraining to stillself
(+b) 2. eternaltransform ineach thisnow
3. beyond linguisticonceptual intermediaries (ineffable immanent)
4. no GodFather no GodSon noGodSpirit neverever a cross
5. trainedbasketball takingwhatDgives forgettingtraining flowingaspartwhole
"Opponents"asfriends. Teammatesasfamily.
Losingself withinplay.
sin - 1. self as separation (where lesseparation = lesself = love)
2. priceoflife as membraneboundbeing
3. sapien's evolutionaryreality both nonpreventable &incurable
but amenabletotreatment via quietingself
4. isolation of organicbeing by pursuingdesires(especiallyeternalife)
&defendingcorememories(self) of successfulsurvivalbehaviors
grace - 1. self'servingdream of livingBeyondCross without rigoroustraining
2. Christianconcept of JesusAsChrist (GodSon) havingdone the workoftraining forus
prayer - self'sattempt to communicatewith a separatedistant illusory supernaturalpersonalentity
prmising protection now & perfection later
evolution - denied within SuperNaturalBeing
soul/spirit/mind - extracellular nonnatural eternalbeing
*********************************************************
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Throwingstones at him An eye foran eye
unlesshisarm is righteous (b+) does a jury evercry?
&I'm withinrange. Rightwrong bothbelong.
Throwingstone thrownstone A tongue for a tongue
crashingthrough myneighbor'shouse. (+) from jurybox to pulpit.
Hisloss beingmine. Sin guilt tothehilt.
Volcanospitting Oneself is allself
beneathocean &onland (+b) there are novictims butself.
buildingplanetearth. Lifedeath in samebreath.
(b+) (+) (+b)
"Didyouhear the oneabout..." "Lookingforthegood inall otherpeople" Toomanygods of judgmentharsh
theother whowouldbe myequal hopingtheydo thesame foryou. howlingtillbanshees run&hide.
tillseeing watcherswatching Understandtheirworld &theirways Be nomore &judgementfails
then uttering samesadsequel? butalways always tothineownself betrue. then silence&peace atlast shallabide.
Beingpure sensoryautomatons Consciousnessrising consciousnessfalling Nonconscious amnesiac totallyunwilling.
with scentofself pollutingscene. Selfconsciousness always overthetop. Tillingearth. Sowingseed. Lettingrainfall.
BigCon UsualSuspects
Christianity being sapien'sbigcon Lesself v. divinity
convincingself that self oughtbeserved. notbecause of
the ususalsuspects
Protection now selfrighteousness
within Father'sfury. hypocrisy
holywars
Perfection later but ratherbecause
by Christ's sacrifice. SuperNatural separates
according to chosenbeliefs
Pricebeing infaceof nature's givengrief.
indulgence in belief
excusingme from training. Divinity testing strengthofconviction.
Lesself resting in transform'submission.
KeepingItReal
Aggregation without congregation. Divinity judging truth&worth.
Stainedglass without cathedral. Lesself nudging I toward secondbirth.
Organ&choir without hymn.
Poetry without littany.
Garden without Eden. Castingintomist.
Watersqueezing throughdamgate.
Love without eternalife. Rainbow roostertail.
ChurchFamily
Crossonspire rising lifetimeshigher
than steadyrising Aprildawnsun.
Agingpenitent crossing agelesspavers
Sundaymorninghope. to imperiouspalace of his HumbleGod.
NotSaturday. NotMonday.
Sundayeveningdread. Agingpriest rising tohis siteofpower Only I
in sight of allHoliness &profane Only I cansin. Only I cannotsin.
in pulpit toreign with righteousness Only I canbelieve. Only I can notbelieve.
over sinfulmultitude.
Podium topulpit to royalthrone
Lonepenitent listening WordafterWord I isknown
Word beingood Word beingtruth. alltoo alltoo alltoo wellknown.
Ancientspirespeaking from heaventoearth
topulpit throughpriest topenitents unholy
who in blindfaith wouldbesaved.
"Fromwhat?" penitent humblyasking
Searchingforspirit. near wroughtirongate in disrepair
A flashlight tofind photons. beingentrance tono GardenofEden
Sniffing for mybreath. but marblegarden of perfectobeisance.
"Fromwhat arewesaved?" asking at arm'slength
with risingsun risingorange in dustydawnsky
oversouls underheadstones of stonecoldgray FreeMarket
quitedeaf quitestill withoutWords withoutsay. Letting freemarket competition
setprice ofour redemption
"Fromwhat dearpriest wouldyou saveusall?" asif lastlevel playingfield
Eachday the sameday with buttercupsblossoming near stonegardenwall wasn'tEden.
cloudmistslopes aridlava
blackwhite seamist shores. "Fromallsin death &poweroftheDevil"
beingpriest's wellpracticed&wellpreachedreply
whilebowing hishead foldinghishands
breathing hisbeatific beneficentsigh.
"What Iasks isthis sin death power?
And whoisthisDevil fromwhom youcower?"
"Youhaveheard TheWord befilledwith TheWord
God'sWord &yourfaith shallset youfree"
wasPriest's firstfront whilebattling forall Inshorelineclearing
wasPriest's lasteffort inHis infinitestall. among whitebirchtrunks &green
lavenderclover.
"But yourWord isthere &Iamhere
yourWords aredry &I liveinfear
Herpain is mypain. thatyourWord istruth butmylife isfact
Notphilosophy. Notfact. thatyourWord isGod yet I feelattacked
Evenbeyondlove. that eachsentence already hastaken my breath
that I'm alreadyjudged with a sentenceofdeath."
"Myson" Priestsaid steppingback spreadingarms.
"Havefaithalone in SonofSons
havefaithalone in Godincarnate
Hisproof ofallove is Mylife in Hisflesh." **Poker**
Youmay thinkitsfunny
Agingpriestbowing backingquietlyaway. but I'm not init forthemoney.
His Son resumingsermon holdingsway.
Wouldwind createwaves I needonly takenough
ifitknew the rise&fall "MyFather is old beyondbattle of wit fromyou blokes
&the end of all? in a witlessworld withbut onesinglewitness." to offset costofblinds&antes
Sonspake inflesh in dewydawngrass &obligatory tokes
ingarden ofrising good&evil.
Sonspake in drywords in spiritlessmass
ingarden of illgrowth &sinkingupheaval.
"Thiswitness wouldbewhom?" humblepenitent asking
withSonwrapping Hisarm aroundshoulder &squeezing.
"Wouldthatwitness beI?" boldpenitent tasking
Nopath tothesea Sonwalking Hisperfection whilebeing unmasked.
yet with selflesspersistence
eachjourney's complete. "Thatwitness mostcertainly wouldbe your I"
Son assuringall in angelwinghush.
"Thatwitness mostsurely willneed todie"
wooedSon through faintpink life'sbloodblush.
Watchingleavesdropping
"YetYoulive" penitentstated breakingaway creating redorange halo
kneeling atfoot of AlmightyWisdom beneath nakedlimbs.
"continuallyliving in corporealfasting
whilebeing ourpromise of life'sbreath everlasting."
"Youtoo shallbe beingalways SpiritBreath
afteryour I meets its tootimelydeath"
smiledSon alsokneeling with penitentbrother
in dawnsun garden of eachI &allother.
"Fromwhat then shall I finallybesaved?"
Cheatingtheseason penitentasking with sun'sheat dryingdew
neither warmcold nor rainsnow rising towalk stonepath as equals
thisnight of fog glow. past ancient oakpulpit &daffodillpew.
"From sinof I from deathofAll
from powerof It myequal" SoulGhost
answered onewitness to gentlespringbreeze. Self creatingsoul
"Fromsin of I fromdeath ofAll with salvation itsgoal.
frompower of It mysequel" Ghosts invoked
answered gentlespringtease to makeme eternal.
bearingfalsewitness.
.......................... Holyghosts at that
"Thatwitness wouldbe I" slashed penitentfool pulledout of myhat
igniting secondblinding in alreadybrightsky. exposingmyhead
to nastyweather.
"Thatwouldbe I &each I wouldbesaid
inaworld of words with saviorsundead!" But not toworry
gashed irreverentfool brokenloose atlast no suddenflurry
from babblingbroth of spiritfast of sanity willassail
lashed irrelvevantghoul strikingout at eachdiety my thickenedskull.
A single egret brokenloose atlast from prisonofpiety.
white emerald perfection Mysoul eternal
with its ripplingstill. "YourFather wouldpray for faithful undying forever vernal
clinging totheirbeing asif beingabrother or sosays mytrusted
withyou Son playing with faithlessunlying soulghost.
being theirown I while reasoningit other.
"Yet I am It darkDevil youdespise.
IamI in spiritlessdisguise.
I ofnoWords. I ofall Lies.
JesusAntiChrist who nevervever dies." Imply
Wordsmouthed in spiritless gardenperennial Self beingboth bow&arrow
eachspring a freshrise of corpusdelicti. butnevertarget
Unlivingundead in a world of self sharpening arrowoftime
with indulgentears but noblood beingshed. creating cause&effect
(arrowshot
"Iam It your antiChristfears. targethit)
Blameme foryourmoment of pain on self'scross. toimply selfexists
Iam It as endofyour endlesslifenears when weallknow
with you suffering hell'sheat in painofneverloss. bowarrowtarget areone
Havingforgotten Lackingcourage to kissmymouth &archer isonly
yetstill makingproperturn carvingdeeper Yourcavern of face&faith shooting his self
whentheroad diverged. till lost in Yourself's sanctimoniousdin intheback.
hearingonlyechos of Yourown endlessin
withI becomingcanyon of Yourown cowardice
withYou clingingtofaith farabove self'sabyss."
"Kissmymouth incestuouSelf
unknowing sweetfreedom of yourdeath.
Kiss solong the lasthiss youhear
willbe leglesslizard's firstsuckingbreath."
Serpentsoulslithering at canyon'srim
still in brightsun riverdepth growingdim
becoming NotHim notHim nothim
all I finallyfalling into darkflowingswim. **BirdBrains**
Buying budgiebird.
Deathimmortal in mindlessimmemorium Teaching it to mimicwords.
deathcomplete in ashlesscrematorium
deathfinally sofinal atlast sopure. Soontiring of repetition
&brainless competition
Constantlygrowing Through gardenofnogates &daffodilsuns trading wordbird
fingernails needtobecut withmoss onrocks nearpath of righteousness for canary.
or hands becomerazors. drying crumplingclumping dispersedbywind
......... unwatered byspirit havingneveroncesinned. Enjoyingsinging
Constantlyworking sansvocabulary.
fingernails needtobecleaned This be transform'slifedeath ancientfather
or hands becomesoil. &son livingon speakingonly of resurrection.
.............................................
Thenboth weregone to HolyHouse
oldtestament father no testament son
afraid tokiss self's unholymouth
causing burningpain of doubt&only
becoming fatherson atonce inflesh
invisible atlast to faithful&lonely.
Afraidto kissother's selfishmouth
leavingarden in pride's desperateflee Commandments
fearing lifedeath's smotheringirreverance Ignoring firstfour.
neverfreeing desiringbeing from self'sabstractions Devil at work
of I of you of me. inHis ironicgame.
.......................... GodFather in self'sfish shame.
Then theyweregone both to sanctumsanctorus
searchingfortheirmaster spiritwhole Embracing fifth.
beingsoimminent yetso elusive BeingJesus
within language'slabyrinthe&abstraction's sieve. as cellsuit'sflame.
Soelusive that eveninprayer allislost
BowingtoBuddha. soimminent &obvious yet thecost. Ah thecost. Dealingwith DONOTS.
KnellingbeforeJesusChrist. GodFather lackingfortitude.
Twomirrors facing. Lonepenitent'smouthspeaking Jesus lackingfaith.
through unholysanctorum
"Especiallyelusive inprayer ifyoudare
seekingtheway inthat delusive lair.
Especiallyreclusive inprayer incarnate
sofull of faith &forgiveness forwhat?
Father bury yourson lethim bedead
gone &never heavensent.
Son slaughter yourfather lethim befed
tohisflock in carnal eucharist. If Soul
If Soul be Mind inchurch
"Fatherson giveupfaith &Mind be feralSelf
asmemories inyourhead whatisSelf whencivilized
orburn inmyhell foreternity. trainedtobehave
Fatherson buryeachword read&said in mixedcompany?
Atlast distanthills joining lessI sans yourprecious selfpity A. Eminence
still abovewavingtassels in simpledeath as neverseeing B. Immanence
still acres tillhome. in simplenow of transform'sbeing." C. Transcendence
D. Imminence
Oldpriest brashson bothfalling totheirknees E. TwoOfTheAbove
beingnow whathey neverbefore couldsayseekorknow F. AllOfTheAbove
unknowing mutebeing of silentsaying G. Forget I BroughtItUp.
unknowing blindbeing of sightlesseeking
unknowing siren of then&when
unknowing purity of this simplenow
unknowing thoughtlessbrain with nomemory tospeakof
unknowing selfishtongue speakingalways of I. **Invasion**
Countingdown from onehundred
Oldpriest brashson eachstumbling on thisnow ninetynine
notbeing welltrained in wanderingfaithlessly ninetyeight
through transform's lifedeatheternal. ni
...............................
Unholy fleshsloughing off wellmuscledbeast Wakingup fixed.
being holydevilspiritghost They scootedup my urethra.
speakingon mute with worldessword tooharsh tohear They reamedout my prostate.
withoutsound or meaning withoutmouth or tongue
within eternaltransform ineach gracelessinstant. Whathappened while I wasasleep
is notatall wellchronicled.
"The spirit yourseeking cannotbefound I havenomemory of dreaming.
Stone VirginMary reigning ineachself wreakingtofind It wasjust businessasusual tothem.
backtoroad amongbirdbaths unbeingeye of stormofself
blessing twoU-Hauls. rulinginpassion&dispassionboth Evenso an invasion of sorts.
beingallword dictatingatdistance Privacyviolated.
thatall islost in knowledgefound Priviledgedinformation compromised.
being all when I is emptied
whereall islost in separation (OK. Notsoprivileged. Butprivate?)
whereall isfound in love."
................
Coldmarbleheadstones of priestfather priestson
becomingmirrors reflecting princeofdarkness&light
here&gone unseen neverknown
neverhere beingboth all&alone.
Coldmarbleheadstones of priestfather priestson
becomingponds reflectingtrees birds sky
withinlife'sdiversity &gentlegyre
of elementalbeing of nolower nohigher.
Coldmarbleheadstones of priestfather priestson
polishedclean of allbeing beneathself's layeredloquaciousness
cellsuitsinging songswithoutwords inlife moreawake
Whatdrama thisrain. than memory'sdream. I Believe
Rivulets joining at root I believe that LeBronJames
cascadinginches. Neitherpulpit notspire neitherson norfather netlessrim
couldsearch tofind or everbother bananaskinball
tosee whatis alwasyonly insight sandycourt
being beyondwrong being beyondright norefs atall the alltooapparent perfectlytransparent ismyidol
emptiness ofall thatis. having redeemedme from
................. playgroundball anarchy
Noonsunhigh skybarelyclouded savedme from barbaricgames
over smallchurch &marblegarden. not bymysuffering intraining
Familyofpriests tending gentlepenitents butby hisdays of sweat&reps
allbeing hushedbreath of stillbeing shrouded. that I mayplay likehim
servingourgame in his style
Spiritbeingwhole ineach husband&wife of rhythmicbeauty
joined in smallchurch at solidoakaltar. &selflessness.
Families&friends lacingbootstraps of communion
allbeing hushedhope intheir stillfaithful life. Evenas he livesforever
.................................... inour everygame
Noonsunhigh skybarleyclouding whatcouldbe
overgarden beyond both cemetery&church. morebeautiful?
Irreverentfew strolling in daffodildelight
A freshleak tonight. allbeing hushedbreath of stilledbeing burgeoning. This is mostcertainly true.
Howdo I deservethisgrace
in these my darktimes? Each&all in eternaltransform
rootingingarden of lessappetite.
Sowing&reaping hopeless faithless
allbeingasdove in gardenoflove.
#################################
Umbrella&pine. Entitledbybirth.
Debating who'll shelterme Confirmedbydivinity.
onmy narrowpath. Sufferingbegins.
Heaven'sFoundation Science&Faith
Heaven'sfoundation being fear I know thatfacts will leadtheway
can'tsupport our greaterbeing beingall to understanding
allbeing gravity but notsomuch grave &that understanding will leadtheway
as wetrip our lightfantastic at our costumeball to good.
ceilingshaking floorboardsqueaking
with you&I dancing onour earthlyfeet I havefaith that I willbedelivered
beforespillingout on pondsidelawn from this vale
to danceourdance with geese&fawn. of
sin&tears.
Nonfearing death in nonspirit high ..................................
knowingheaven only asnow's bluebirdsky The all is knowable
hearing geesehonking watchingthemwinging &thatknowledge canmitigate
freebecause neverasking howorwhy. the ravages ofan indifferent nature
& of time itself
Heaven'sfoundation being fear ifonly
I canonly shed a tear ifonly
for thosesolost they canonly befound
buriedalive in perfection'sground. faith canpass thetest of ticktocktime
ifonly
TwoPaths ifonly.
Twopaths wherethere's onlyone. ..............................
A singlesun of eachmillionth none Unknowing is a flowering
asif from eternity'seed
counting beingcrying nurtured by lesself
from facelessface at the expense of
of self'sfacade belief
or gracelessgrace meaningpurpose
of fatallyflawedGod faithope
asif forgiveness
seeking eachfool'sjourney goodness.
furtherinto desire.
Lutheran
St.Francis I'mLutheran
Havinglivedsimply theway an alcoholic
churchesarising &legends isan alcoholic
hundredfold in size. forever.
Havinglivedsimply It'sbeen about
churchesarising offering twentyears without
hope a hollowprize. succumbing.
His simplehabit Beforethat
spreadunder protectiveglass headytimes.
unable to age.
............... Butwithme
Havinglivedsimply valuing sobriety
churchesarising &pride I'm atlast becoming
from darkenedskies. drunkonlove.
Havinglivedsimply AllSaviors
churches arising &worship To allsaviors of myworld
whereonce were goodworks. you'resaving only yourself.
His simpleremains Fromwhat forwhat I knownot
on display for allfaithful but
unable to rest. unknown mybeat goes on.
...........
Havinglivedsimply To allsaviors of myworld
let him die simply you'resinning all alone.
burning his raiments.
Tobe sofree todissect thee
His simpleteaching intoparts wherewhole isall.
made somethingspecial
thenlost. To allsaviors of myworld
cease&desist atonce
Burn eachchurch then&now when&now
yousee. weavingpulse of transform.
BlushBike Shade
Pretty playgroundprincess buddingpink Penitentstanding
riding newbike across basketballcourts. in shadeofcross
Practicingbalance trainingwheels toddering notbelieving
brother buildingddreams with sandcastleforts. anythingbeyond
but fireydeath.
Bike beingblush fromframe to roseseat
spoked palmhubs stretchingfingers to tires. Yet curious
Speechlessdaddy pushingoff lettingo. taking a glimpse
Wheelwhirl a faintfire on herfirst pleasurepyre. beingblistered
nearlyblinded
Hand lockingtight ongrips of purewhite returning to security
with lavenderstreamers hanginglimp withoutlift. of shadeofcross.
Acrosslines on asphalt awayfrom herparents ...................
wafting infaith on her magicalgift. Irreverant climbingcross
facingmaster
Turning soslowly hersmile lightingsky beingnailedfirmly.
heart onhershirt poundinghard fromwithin.
Pedaling towardparents across vastabyss Bright&hot but
to comfortawaiting as hugehug&smallkiss. unblistered
unblinded
An afterchurch outing in church of allove by sight of their
knowingheaven's not faraway or wayabove. bareself.
Familytogether in purityofprayer ...........
allgodsforgotten in moments sorare. Feeding self to flame
beingconsumed bysame
Higher awakening
(Thanks EmDickinson.) withonly scars&shards
Ofcourse myGod is higherthanme. &dreamories of self
His etherealbeing. Mygravity. &
unknowing unfelt bliss
Hisheaven is up. Mydoubt is down. of lesself lost
Histhrone a verb. Mystool a noun. in transform'smist.
So I mustwait for mysoul torise **FourExcuses**
to join Hisbeing beyond blueskies Fourexcuses for words
by sheddingweight of myselfishlies 1. Lookout!
to ascend towhere alldoubt surelydies. 2. Dinner'sready.
3. Doyousmoke aftersex?
(But canlove everbe withinfog of sighs?) Idon'tknow. I'veneverlooked.
4. Singinglovealoud.
HolyHill - Part 1
Beforetransform becametime
beforetime becameword
beforeword becamesurrogate
for reality.
Beforesapienselfishness
encountering desire'sfriction
with memory'tprediction
manifesting as mortality
forcing wiseones to augmentreality
with demands for lifeternal.
Cross onhilltop spire Me myself & I
dead &dried &handcrafted Beforelifeforms of thumb&tongue a trinity worthworship
piercingheaven'sfloor. when encounteringsting of selfconsciousness in a selfishworld.
choosingessence overexistence
creating SuperNaturalBeing as futuretense
SimplyNaturalBeing becomingminion
of gods&afterlives.
Thisnow outshown by lifeternal.
Beforedefense of immortalself
creatingBabel of dominance
over sin death &powerofdevil
becomingdesire's worstnightmare.
Eleventhousandyearsago
a blind a wink of blindbindingbeing
from a facelessuniverse of unknowing
meaningpupose faithope &even simplefact
glaciersreceding from southernWisconsin
leaving morethanone kettle&morain
& a hill 1,500feetabove farawaysea
unlabeled holyorprofane.
Ninethousandyearsago
After calmsummer a wink a blink of emptyseeing Umbrella tugging.
RiverBirch shakingofftwigs from a namelessuniverse of mystery Wind justfollowingorders.
duringautumnstorm. limestoneroding into cathedralcaves Rain stugglingtosoak.
(though therebe nobishop
to deemit official)
in a rangeofhills of northwesternIsreal
named asone as Mt.Carmel
1,700feetabove MediteraneanSea
beingunlabeled wild&free.
HolyHill - Part 2
**Numbers** 860 years P.J. (Post Jesus)
1. Newton goodwithnumbers. Elijahdefending hisfaith in hisGod
2. Darwin notsomuch. challenging falseprophets of Baal
3. Frued hardlyatall. to a simpletest of unnaturalpower
4. Siddhartha as heuristicdevice? bysetting sacrificial ox ablaze.
Match A-D
with 1-4. Afterfailing the infidels beginningtocower
A. Truthful as Elijah murders 350 heathens inall.
B. Playful 1155 Mendicant hermits becomingCarmelites. **WeCreatures**
C. Uncouthful 1209 Carmelites becoming of of four We creatures
D. Useful GreatMendicantOrders within CatholicChurch. of discretion&accretion
1562 St.TereseofAvila returns Carmelites selfdefense a seemingly
to historicsausterity (but letsthem wearsandals naturalsecretion
'footwearofthepoor' instead of beingtrue totheir inourbattle to disguise
descalced[barefoot]origins). our disgust&fear
1673 FatherMarquette "discovering" the glacialhill. withbeing whilebeing
1862 FrancoisSoubrio first whiteresident (perhaps). a slug sonear
1879 A shrineconstructed. saltwater.
1906 BavarianDescalcedCarmelites invitedtolivethere.
1931 Presentchurch consecrated.
2006 Shrine 'elevated' to minorbasilica
by PontificDecree of PopeBenedict XVI.
Thus 435acres &TheHill 30milesNW of Milwaukee became
BasilicaofOurLadyofMary, HelpofChristians
Singleloonlanding with Carmelitefriars as 'activecontemplatives' Seeingreflection.
havingcircles fromafar wearing 'scapular' as a sign of devotion&protection Doglapping ripplingspreading.
ripplingtoward herstill. of MotherMary & a reminder ofthier 'dutytolove'. Bothourthirsts nowquenched.
HolyHill - Part 3
Dawn seepinginto limesonecaves
of Mt.Carmel's premendicant hermits.
Horizon's floridskydisplay
dancingwithin as crystallineballet
sanscelebration awe or veneration
justanother dailystart totheir simplelives
of unquestioningduty to muscle&heart.
On HolyHill a middaydawn
sun floodingapse through stainedglassgospel
flanksofnave midday scripturecaves
&lessons in secondarysentience
with history beggingforbelief
demanding knowledge&reverence.
...................................
Mt.Carmel's hermits on hilltop
returninghome after savageday
flooded by chromatic rave
fullyembraced bythesefaithlessfew.
Everywindow wreathed. AlmostChristmasEve
Santa on wraparoundporch. InWisconsin spire of yet twopumpkins stillonporch
No nativity. killedmilledconifers certainlyrotted.
toppedwith crossofsacrifice
ironicallyfilleting heaven'sfloor
creating gapping transcendent trapdoor
spillingbothsaints&angels
perhapspreventing righteousascension
as ChristianGod's greatestexpression.
Mt.Carmel hermits living in
unadulteredinnocense
treelinemanicured by windrain&age
livingdying withneithr liturgynorcreed
Tooloud for thought lackinglitany &holysage. Speed&still asone
toofixed for hesitation with nomemory intruding
stream straighteningbanks. Cavern as naturalcloister onmy lonelywalk.
effulgent with limefilledmoisture
stalactitesmelting in mineralgyre
whose spiralweeping forming
stalagmitespire eachallgrowing
asif toacquire Michelangelo'sfail
by connecting earthairwaterefire
prevailing as basiliclikecolumns
whilelacking PontificDecree
being aslove oflove entire.
Caved wellers in catacombs of nobelief
Neither bright Northstar seekingnorelief from mundanemiracles Winter withoutsnow
nor neighborhood festivelights of ElementalBeing &SimplyNaturalgrief. is prisonwithoutparole
outshining fullmoon. cold gloomy hopeless.
Churchfiars cloistering in writtencreed
proudoftheir diminishedneed
sheltering from transform'sunrelentingwaves
watchingdawndusk through stainedglassgospel
with faithope in Calvary prayingforJesus tosave.
................................................
Coda
Stained strained pained
tillmy naturenurture waned
childhoodbelief beingblamed
for my selfishness&mysuffering.
Sacred scared scarred scored
Agedulledefenses bythe sword that piercedtheChrist. Whiteboard meltingclear
failing micromanagement exposing moss&lichen.
of senseofbalance. Resurrection's scandal lifeternal's scam Message now writgreen.
cave beingascommon as cathedral is contrived.
Calvary'scancer as captiouscanon
seen throughaze of doctrinalglaze
where inhalation is inspiration
where respiration is disputation
untenable in the smirkingface of faith.
Withspire lordingover pastoralfarmland
asif toaspireto beinghigher&higher
asif leaf sanstwig branchtrunk&root
asif flower sanspollen beautysansfruit
couldnourish eachliving or honor alldead.
...........................................
Livingwithin mineralmonuments
embalmed in elementalstrife
cavedwell with absolutelyno thoughthell
in haptichabit of primalsentience
MockingChristmastrees? beingpollinator from eon's Guardogneighborhood
Magnoliaskirt touchinglawn. transformative hive. barking as Christmasgreeting
Whatisthere tohide? ............... snarlingifapproached.
Paternal SuperNatural.
Fraternal SupraNatural.
Maternal SimplyNatural.
Choosewisely.
##########################
Sin God Soul
SelfIndulgentNarcissim GlimpseOfDivinity SourceOfUnlimitedLove
SincereIntellectualNonsense GroundOfDelusion SeaOfUnknowingLove
SelfIndignantNeeding SenseOfUltimateLove
SeparateInNeed Devil SenseOfUnderstandingLifedeath
SeparateInNature DelusionEverVivid SecureOpinion of UtopianLife
SeparateInNurture of ImmortalLife SemblanceOfUnctuousLife
DetailsEverVivid SourceOfUlcerousLie
of ImmoralLife StreamingOceanUplifitingLibido
Lacking WhatPrayer
Lackingassumption of divinity Whatprayer
doeslight through stainedglass ifprayer beprayer
becomedarker or brighter? canbestartled
by songbird'shrill
Withoutpromise of lifeternal landingclose
will meadowstream ripplemore or less? as silent as mysit
thensigning
Withtransform grounding time'sarrow allbeing'song?
does cupid'sarrow failtofind itsmark?
Restrain?
Lovingcathedrals Lifeseemingly misery&suffering.
will I ever noticeclouds Perhaps I can'tfathom God'splan Hiswill.
in their proteanephemeral being? Perhaps myself could judgeless if still.
Whatoftransform in God'seyes If former disciplinenecessary in restrainingself.
eachmoment being unique If latter disciplinenecessary while trainingself.
random
eternal? If former separationaccepted supplication calledfor.
If latter separationrejected sublimation forevermore.
TooEasy
Hallofame without anypain If former separation our naturalstate
from legs&lungs asif God mademe
needingconditioning? in Hisimage butnot
of His substance.
No windsprints If latter separation an aberration
no shinsplints asif nature mademe
no repetitions of its substance
no retributions in His absence.
for sacrifices unmade
for dues unpaid If former SuperNatural necessary
yet mypicture's on to spirit me onmyway.
Wheatiesbox. If latter Naturesufficing
invitingme tostay.
There's no easyway
I can't justsay There is nolove in restrainingself.
"Withbelief I needonly pray." Love is self trained to still
expectingreality to yieldtofealty
ofmyfaith lost in selfishness&desire. Impotence
I must castout alldoubt.
Gifthorses I must build a Bableofaith.
trojanhorses I must build a ladderofhope.
horses of anothercolor I must climb that gymclassrope.
all illusions paintedbright
with self'spallor &reason'sight All love mustexist above&beyond
to avoid muchneeded valor But Jesusleft withoutme.
whilefacing reality &
needtotrain. If Godcouldhelp by comingtome
He'dprove perfectlove & hisimpotence.
Sequence
Havingbeenborn of flesh&blood father
havinglived a life as toohuman son
itseasy tosee why the sequence thoughbackwards
seemstoflow from FatherSon toward the SpiritOne.
With GodFather as allpowerful architect
ThemePark & Jesus as foreman with plan todirect
Ridingrides & I simpleworker constructingmylife
or GhostSpirit unneeded inmy busyneglect
dozinginshows.
Eachnail inmyhouse a nail inmycross
Gyre of reality me building a tower ofmy privateBabel Evidence
or filling eachroom with neverforgetting Nowrits werewrought
chosentruth. building faithpower ofmy privatefable. in GardenOfEden
therebeing absolutely
Heretic Living fromGodFather toGodSon toGodGhost noevidence of fairplay.
or without a feel for transform'swhole
penitent. sleepingdays dreamingnights
.......... with purposenarrowed to a singlegoal
LaserTag to protect my self from breadthof allbeing
Joiningfray from my homesick need facing heaven'sheight
or tosecure my I in myattic of ration
eatingwhilewaiting remnants of pastlost in dustydimlight.
........................................................................
Hidinginambush ClingingtoFather with furyofaith
or neverfully becoming the son whomIam.
prowlinginattack. Living inhouse of myfear of allother
drinking stagnantwater slowedstill by stormdam. Chlorophyll muting
chromatics flashingbrilliance
Tillfinally thathouse becomingtomb forSon with season'scooling.
withFather a picture oversmoking hearthfire
wordsleading eachdeed factsfailing as truth
spirit burningfaint on forgotten hearthpyre.
Chimney finallynarrowed by creosotecreed.
House igniting truebelievers runningoutside.
Mydam finallybursting from powerof flow
extinguishingflames of faith thathasdied.
...................................
Homeless faithless each lesself lifeform
sittingbystream in smolderingclothes.
Atlast divinginto clearcold unknowing
emerging to mergewith faintmist asitblows
till allthat'sleft of house neverhome
Threecrows on roofcrest are ashestoashes & FathertoSon Fiction? Nonfiction?
silhouetted at sunset & a clearp&present emptynow My autobiograph
over oldfolks' home. lesself having grown from the unholyone. true atleast tome.
..............................................
Sitting at gentlyflowing riverside
sequence tooclear tosay orshow
eachspawn ofbeing a self&son
GodFather dimming in faith'sfalseglow.
FromSpirit toSon whobirthed theFather
tocomfort eachchild throughstorms of self
comes fullyformed lesself to fullnessof life
in fullfeeling's firstcoming to love's fullwealth.
.......................................
**WinterDream**
My simple onetime wintergoal Nowfeasting on thishole thatbeast
to avoid waterhazard onmy nemesistic hole planning toclearpond intwo atleast
toplay mygame &have somefun ball gainingspeed then hittingice
notneeding glory of holeinone takingoffquickly skippingtwice.
nor magicalpar with puttingwand
butsimply tosurvive thatdevilpond. Asfate wouldhaveit fate so unkind
knowingmyball would miraculouslyfind
Havinglost a dozenballs & twoclubs filament of protruding fountainpipe
inthat sinisterpool of Sirencall causing my bellowing expletivegripe
wanting thathole tobeless than a chore that musthavebeenheard
regardless of myfinalscore. fullacross Dellcounty
causingpolice topost
Goingout togetback by SuperBowl a onegrandbounty
playingonly thatwatery seventh hole for creature theyfigured mustbeferal
bynow icehard full of frozenkelp thoughironically whilescreaming
rendering that hithertohazard a help. Iwasfeeling halfsterile.
Pondbeing snowcovered &frozensolid Finally myball didland &die
&so mydemeanor stonecold&stolid. leaving a precarious thinice lie
Climbing clubfence with fourclubs only so grippingmyseven I sent it to greenheaven
playingalone but neverlonely. whilesinking indeep frigidsea.
.................................
Beingcarefulnot todrive mydrivetoofar Having playedout mypar sloshingtocar
notshooting forbirdy butonly forpar. struggling todrive in encrustedclothes.
Notwantingball on thinicefreeze Atlast athome mymindstartingtoroam
whereI'd havetoplayit on hands&knees. replayingmymastery before roaringfire.
Takingout sixiron making firstswing Then&when mywife askingwhy
low&behold almostmissing durnthing. I needed new golfshoes I said with a sigh
Wrapped in fourlayers with fatfuzzymittens "seventh hole honeydear thatdang seventh hole"
myswing asif swung by twotinykittens. shenodded fullknowing as I sat todry.
Doffingtwolayers baringonehand Fiasco ending as surelyfated
lookinglike a creature fromsomehinterland havingcome tocourse with singlepurpose.
launchingshotsafely to topofhill Thenperpetrating singular outlandish circus
ball breaking icecrust buringstill. havingconquered parfour socruelyrated.
After diggingitout citing "deepwinter" rule Nowlying in pnemonialbed
reaching for fouriron my deepwinterfuel. fevercausing ceremonial dread
Unlaunching topspinning groundhuggingskimmer seeing myself as thousandleggedsnake
headingforpond like a midwinterglimmer with winterdreamskin finallyshed.
of hope thathis wouldbe myday --------------------
whenthishole thatpond wouldfinallypay Yourlove as witchcraft
forall embarrasments ofmypast layingbare allremembrance
making summerlast my finalfast. of springrose pondswan.
RescueDawn
(movie)
Captivescapee rescuedbyshipmates from junglesofLaos
where hewas "turned" by fellowprisoners.
(We werenever in Laos.)
Beingdebriefed by "company"suits.
Then backonhis aircraftcarrier facingcohorts
an MC &an admiral.
"What'syourfaith in God&country?"
**HighSchool A squirrelylook of incomphrehension.
Band
ColorGuard** "Come on Dieter you gottabelieve in something."
Ashlin Eyesrising lightening with faintsmile
Ashleigh
Caitlin "Ibelieve Ineed a steak."
Crystal
Crista Thunderousapplause&laughter
Carlene fromhisbuddies.
Charlene
Chloe "Can you givesomething totheboys
Chayna to helpthem get through nomatter
Kaitlin howhard itgets?"
Kaitlyn
Kaylynn Eyesdown. Thoughtful.
Kayee Eyes stilldown then liftingslowly
Kayleigh with his gentle reply
Kayla
Karysa "Emptywhat'sfull. Fillwhat'sempty.
Kora Scratch whereit itches."
Kimberly
Kimberlyn Thunderousapplause&laughter
Katie fromhisbuddies. Whyable to fly
Katy ................. when eachacre of grassland
Shana God is a universe?
Jane country ................
faith Whyable to think
steak. when eachsense allowed tobe
Which isthe oddone out? is perfection's sea?
Rank
Sapiens loving Comfortnow
concepts 350millionme's
morethan maybetomorrow
convention a manlymeal.
permitting IQ Which isthe evenone in?
to pullrankon SQ
leavingmealone Imprisonedforever till imprisonedwiththree
to reconsider who eachday amputated a pairofhislegs.
allmy livechoices.
He jimmedlocks ontheirhandcuffs.
They gavehim the key tothe gatelessgate.
He returned as he left Duringmybriefnap
but notatall as he left. mywife has worndownmountains
into tasseledplains.
Answeringrelative with absolute
absolute with relative.
Thensmiling.
Then silent.
#######################
Smellingspringflowers Hearingmyownvoice Quiet wildcountry
Thinking allisforgiven (b+) rebounding through deepvalley. (b+) where eachprayer is listened to
atleast forgotten. Hearingmyownvoice. &allprayer answered.
Pickingspringflowers Listening. Thevoice. Quiet wildcountry
for a boquet for mylove (+) All voice. Novoice. Nosound. (+) whereprayer is unheardof
&anotherchance. Just the listening. &allprayer unheard.
Springflowerfragrance Hearingmyownvoice Wild quietcountry
a boquet forallunjudged (+b) rebounding through deepvalley. (+b) where heartbeats are life'srhythm
&all unjudging. Hearing whisperwind. &eachbreath is all.
ManyRooms Criteria
Inmymansion thereare manyrooms. WilliamJames' criteria
Staywithme please. Playwithme please. for judging spiritualideas
Enjoy allpleasures desire canHopefor luminous
inmykitchen of cravenGluttony reasonable
inmybedroom of Lust&Envy helpful.
inmyattic of Sloth&Anger ..............................
inmylibrary of intellect'sPride Yet criteria are judgments
inmy vault of Greed byme againstallother
onmy altar of Creed &all idea is spiritual
where I becomedrunk havingcomefrom nowhereverywhere
on Goodness&Faith. allbeing within my clingingmemory.
....................... ............................
Inmymansion therere manyrooms tobesure "Luminous"? Perhaps "liminal"?
&outside a stream&garden. Each beingbetterthan
"personifiedincomprehensibility".
Walkwithme please. Notalk withme please.
Let song of ourstillness "Reasonable"? Perhaps "subliminal"?
be selfless rightwrongless Inanycase Reason&Spirit sharing a bed?
&each footfall
muchfartherfrom "Helpful"? Perhaps "criminal"
heavenhell. foraskingGod forfavors?
...........................
Decay Judgment itself be Soul as selfishness originalsin of separation. me desiring eternalife. JustaskJesus.
Tombstones weatheraway Recluse
casketsdecay Desiringimmortality.
eternaltransform Denyingtransform'sbrutality.
always nature'sway. Seekingsupernaturalexcuse.
Becomingreligiousreclus
LostTime
I can'tremember yesterday
or when I went to bed.
It's notjust that it'sfuzzy
it'sjustnot inmyhead.
I knowmyname&where I live
I candrive&work&eat.
I justcan'tremember howIfelt PrimerGray
&if I atecorn or onlymeat. Sundaysky of primergray
above darkgreenfield&trees.
Your bloodpressure'sfine youhave nofever. Whatcolor mightGodpaint today
Your pulse is steady your reflexes quick. &would itmatter if I pray?
**IfNot ** Yourpupils are normal you havenopain
Ifnotfor skintube & you've had nosymptoms inthepast. Singlehorse silentneigh
restraining animalfat amongdaisies bees&buzzing.
hotdog nitrite Your bloodwork isnormal your livertests too. DoesGod have ears for horse'say
wouldkillus outright. Yourmuscles arestrong youcanmake a tightfist. unheard if I hadn't passedthisway?
Yourmind is agile you're notbefuddled
Ifnotfor skintube &your GI tract is showingnotcyst. Now heavenrent by yellowray
restraining animalfat &onthewing a brightbluejay.
my passion'sflare Perhaps yourbrain ison the fritz. DoesGod wantme headbowed onknees?
wouldsoil you pubichair. I'll referyou to a neurologist. Isthere a tribute I mustpay?
.........................................
I havenoheadaches no ringing inmyears. Field cutdry&rolled as hay
Myequilibrium is equilateral I trip butneverfall. with two youngirls in merryplay.
My vision is single I sleepthrough eachnight DoesGod feelspringsoft waiftingbreeze
Idon't dodrugs noteven alcohol. unknowing eachseason is sabbathMay?
I seenotrauma no somaticdistress.
On everytest I administer yourbrain is nimble.
Your alphas&betas are rhythmic&smooth
&you'veproved tobefascile with everysymbol.
Your electrolytes are balanced &yourneurons aretransmitting
Your CATscan seemsnormal &your frontalobes areclean.
ProfaneSoul You'vepassed everytest paperpencil &machine. InFaith
Mind All I canconclude isthat its inside yourbean. Abidingospel a grazingsheep
self's profanesoul nolongerlamb yetstill childreaming.
lackingdivinity Perhaps yourpsyche needsanassist. Sleeping. Trusting angel'spulse
but I'll refer youto a psychiatrist. topump mybeing tillawakening.
wreaking of .............................. ................................
supernatural. I don'thearvoices &there'sonly oneofme inme. No lambofGod but rutting ram
I've never blackedinorout it'sjust mymemory. makingitsfatal leap of faith.
I neverlovedmymother inthat weirdo way I mean GoodFriday to Sunday in a singlebound
&mydad&I rarelyfought we gotalong justkeen. losingforever reason's Saturdaysound.
...........................
Mydreams are quiteboring myfantasies hot. Nolamb noleap nofaith nosleep
Your inkblots are interesting yourquestions arenot. lessself tosave nosoul tokeep
I don'tbrood on death &I'mnot knowntopine. for evenangels breathe life&death
I'm notlosing mymind I'mjust losingsometime. unknowingtranform's eternalbreath.
Your frame of reference hasbeenundone.
You'renot schizophrenic butneither areyou one.
Timelost is timespent ina &derelict town.
It'sclear you'resuffering from a partialbreakdown.
Yousurely havesome problemsrepressed
but twiceaweeksessions shouldbring somesuccess.
Liedownhere rightnow &we'llbegin
but I don'tunderstnad your quizzicalgrin.
........................................
It'slikethis dearpastor thatshrink wasadink.
Forthemoney hecharges I'lleventrypraying. MeMeMe
Sohow canyouhelpme am I missing a link? Whatgreaterlove ofme byme
& mysociopathy whowouldsteal eachsoul piecebypiece. than confuringimmortality
(which I mercifullygrade RelyonFather Son HolySpirit notfor theibody borntodie
at sevenofeleven where with diligentpenance yourproblemwillcease. butfor my self meprecious I.
one is MotherTeresa &
eleven is DonaldTrump) Thedevil hascaused your breakout fromfaith WouldJesusdie for a selflessigh
is harmless to others nailngyoufirmly tocross of thought. from a being unbelieving Heaven'swhole?
isthat Withprayer youcanfocus yourmind ontheFather WouldJesusrise without selfishcries
I don'tcarenough &fill thatlostime with whatyou'vebeentaught. imploringsalvation from each lonelysoul?
todo anything about it.
GodFather forgiving allbelieving inHisSon. Allforme tosave myface
Stopquestioning grace &curing hasbegun. heavenbeing love'sdisgrace
................................ judgingood &better &best
Ironically pastor givingme foodforthought asif truefaith my finaltest
on what I was seeking & whatshould besought. while lostinlove as transform'sguest
Thetime I waslosing maybe ofmychoosing unknowing unknown shortlived unblessed.
with thoughtlogic becoming muchtooconfusing.
Perhaps its a thinker who'sgone hislastmile
whocanfind mylost time &mylostsmile?
.........................
Yousay yoursympton is one&only.
You'relosing time without a trace.
Yet yourliving yourlife intime quitewell.
Fish outofwater Perhaps outoftime your've foundyourfirstface?
flopping on narrow drypier **Worms **
afraid to getwet. It's a luckyperson whocannot remember Whereare our fishingworms?
........... the emotion gluedto unrehearsedaction. I puthem inthefridge yesterday
Whale after deepdive You'renot losingtime you'regaining perfection to keepthemfresh.
memory its boyuancy by beingthisnow ¬living abstraction.
intellect its air. Ohyeay. I atethem
........... Burningineachmoment leavingnoash bymistake.
Breathinigocean'slife inthatheat of attention yourmemoryrecoiling
unknowing either wet dry as mothtoflame toohot to alight You ateourworms?
being transform'slove. you'rebarley maintaining your flutteringflight. By "mistake"?
You'rebeginning to breakthrough the shell of your I Yeah. I wasreaching for
by forgetting yourbirthday letting go mentalhealth. leftover chickensalad
Bybeing unborn you'reundoingdying but grabbedtheworms.
yourlost time is lostself &yourfirst emptybreath.
And youdidn'tnotice
So identitybreakdown is transformative indeed whatyou wereating?
& a breakup with faith is the freedom I need?
I must turn my Id to Ego inorderto strick I washungry
a healing blow? & a snacks a snack.
You're gettingclose but nocigar.
The Freudian ego is a frigidstar.
Weneed an ID before wecanbefree
since wecan't notbe until we are.
Faith is a firststep towardsanity
Desanguinating withoutwhich wecan never breakthrough. Canyousee?
crimsonpool spreadingthinner Tobefaithless isnot an insanity Watchingwinterstars
evaporating. weneed to notwant before becoming free. whilestanding in lastnightsnow.
Still wondering still.
Yourword areconfusing. I maymisundertand.
Canyougiveme a more concrete helpinghand?
Ofcoursenot you unknowthat. Seethetwinkle inyoureye.
Wordsbeing partsonly of elementalbeing.
You'rebeginning to sense that unknowing without tense
is the time you'vebeenlosing whiletraining toward clearseeing.
Be unpleased withyourprogress. You'reone ofthelucky.
Most living faithorknowledtge thusalways in sin
&separatedbyself from eternal love **Beat?**
searchingthen prayingwhen whilehoping for a win. How can I expect to beat
Internetpoker when I can't
Then I should nothope tolose more of me evenbeat a shapedsheet?
neverlamenting loss of memory?
**Ambidextrous** Notknowing whatyouknow mustbelost in thisnow.
Whenyou're cockyenough You'rebecoming mymaster &forthat I mustbow.
to thinkyourself ambidextrous .......................................
try masturbating withyour Memory ourstorm.
offhand. causingretreat to dankcave Nearing Christchild'sbirth
of self selfalone. coloredbulbs for fallenleaves
self's heavenonearth.
Forgetting as peace
in my oceanofbeing.
Without thus withall.
############################
BreechBirth
Leavingmymother tethered&headfirst
thinking being mysurvival's firsthought.
Yet evenmybrain by mother'smilk nursed
Born a millipede buildingmybody till I canbetaught Living in the Matrix
managing somanylegs unaware of unaware
withjust onesmallself. thatwords are mywill fulfillingmywant selfish through&through.
............... asif essence preceding existence ..............
Being centipede asif mybeing be as debutante Warring in Matix
siniging my hundredlegsong guaranteeing a life of selfdefense. bound to set coppertops free.
with tongue ineachleg. Bound to the binding.
................... Nurtured to God'spaternalprotection ............
Training tobe snake. in a worldfull of pupose&meaning At peace in matrix.
Bodymoving with lesself promised by Christ eternalperfection Living within the program
without will or way. suffering till divinity'sweaning. while living without.
Betterbreechbirth landingon one'sbackside
than bornentitled &thoughtjustified.
MyDebt
Noone canpay for mysins but myself.
Look the Philanthropist deadinhiseye
God answers allprayers he'sellingyou snakeoil a blantantlie. Sitting on His throne
&theanswer you'regiven wieldingpower of lifedeath
is whatyou desire. Or He'syou in greasepaint&rednose. &worse damnation.
............. ................
Christ answers allprayers Don'taccept Hisgift. Unknowing sorrow.
&theanswer israrely Eachgiver is LordOfDarkness Just a moment onthe cross
whatyouwant tohear. &what youtake willconsumeyou. learning lonliness.
........... .....................
Thereare no questions Or acceptHisgift. Havingfelt oursin
thereisjust thisbreath thisbreath Heis the SonOfGod now powerlesstopunish.
thisbreath thisbreath love. &thatwhich youtake Separation lost.
willbe heavenlyjoy.
Howill I know?
I can't.
Buteach giftgiver
willbepaid.
Even I amJesus
theChrist.
Collecting all ash .......... Eachlovingperson's
fromthefire of everyself. Noonecanrepay finalglimmering being
Immortality. for my sinofself. impotence of God.
......... Itis the debtlessdebt ...............
Oncethefire is out in a universe without Eachthinkingperson's
using ash to fertilize. currency. terminalinsight being
Just morality. impotence of truth.
............ .............
Burning hot. Ashless. Foreach trainedlesself
Noface. Notrace. NoNothing. Quiz-4 lastrecollectionbeing
Lost duality. A B impotence of love
Meaningfull Manifest
purpose. plainess.
Energetic Embrace
seriousness. simplicity. Jailing
Belief Afterflood
"We must try to love so well Reasonable Reduce Godjailing riverlakeocean.
that we may believe, in the end, sanctity. selfishness.
in God. Dryearth onfire.
Heroically Have Godjailing sun.
Thereis no beginningending focused few
toGod tobelief tolove. determination. desires. Atomosphere ashfilled.
Godjailing air.
Thereis nobelief inlove WhichColumnContains
& noGod withoutbelief. Tao? Dryhotdarkpolluted
Affirmation? Godjailing plants
Therefore asif
thereis theycould breathe
noGod forus
inlove. &weep
forus.
PoeticParadox 1 PoeticParadox 2
FaithinGod = MoralCode = RightWrongBehaviors. FaithinGod = Eternityin Heaven.
RightWrongBehaviors = Judgment = Separation = Sin. Heaven = PerfectSelf.
Therefore: FaithinGod = Sin. Self = Separation = Sin =Hell.
Therefore: FaithinGod = EternityinHell.
Eden
Gardenofthistle gardenofthorn tothink beyond mylonelyself.
this by myactions &Hisdecree. Touching with thought&words alone
Pain tomother onday I wasborn using herbicide forgotten on gardenshedshelf
pain asmybirthright the onlythingfree suicide sendingcellsuit to still&unknown.
with knowledge condemningme toservitude Gardenofthistle gardenofthorn
thought condemningme to sin&die thisbeing theway itis rightnow.
battlingearth for eachcrumb of food Painwhenpicked & bloodwhenpricked
paindeepening with thatsingleword "Why?" gloveless willess learninghow
Gardenofthistle gardenofthorn to gardensafely among harsh thorneyplants
this bymyacion &willingacceptance. while lovingall that's green&grows
Pain toHisSon &allsons who conform. judgingnot seed&soil's naturaldance
Pain to mybirthwrong notgiven a chance bowingslowly smellingeachrose.
WhenGrace SnakeOil
Whengrace comescheap all truehunters weep Snakeoil salesman
as selfrighteous settleforcarrion. offering cureall tonic
Whathunt passesup eventherunt promsing
seeking alreadydead as paragon. protection now
perfection later
Whengrace comescheap livinglifeasleep at nocost whatsoever.
dreamingalone rarleymaking a bond.
Or wakingtotask of rippingof Christ'smask ButHisproduct was whisky
discovering He'syou &thatyou've beenconned. madewith saltwater
....................................... &all whosampled becameaddicted
Howdoyouask a truebeliever toquestion &died.
what they'veheard fromeveryone they everloved?
Could theyaccept a heartfelt suggestion
that there's another wayto unpray? Noah
Needing justification
Strengthened by truefaith in Thee for speciation
faithful thathey're completelyfree surely an embarassment
could they lovingly consent toagree to omnipotence.
that allother maynotbe completely lost?
..................................... Was sevendays
Howdoyouask a satisfiedbeliever waytoo longshort?
whytheythink theydeserve somethingfornothing?
BecauseChurch's entire holymission
is promisingeachsin's debtlessremission. OfCourse
Ofcourse churchwindows
Yet self is swellingfrom toomuch indwelling are stainedglass.
content withpromise that graceisfree Stainedwithseparation.
whenonly witheffort will I hear bells knelling
markingdeath of my selfishme? Showing bold&holydeeds
...................................... of then.
Stilldragging mycellsuit ohso illfit Picturing beauty&peace
forthe blashpemouswork of training to unknowing of when.
that I amtheproblem I amthe shit
needing a purging tobegin love'sflowing. Blocking thisnow's
cloudlesssky.
Holdingmynose wrinklingmytoes
flushingall I knew asfaith. Snow confused &buds.
Pullingup mypants takingachance "Is it still winter or spring?"
facingtheprice of abandoning grace. theyask eachother.
Chocolat
(The movie.)
Simplesugar fuelingstupor of time Can medievalbodies&minds of marble
wherecrusted in sclerotic hourglass meltslowly on tongue of sweetsweetsilence
medievalmind becoming marbleheart &smile of innocentpassion
penitents mocking warmth of eachbreath &shamelessindulgence.?
with transcendentfreeze
within pretenseofpiety. Let Jesuslive drinkwine &sing.
Letmarriage meld hardenedbody
All pretense&postense with calcifiedmind.
with eachbreath held in righteoustension
&allifebound intentionally Slough falsesuffering of a Christ undead
to a Christ who hadnever ever lived. &unforsakenlove of a stonecoldFather.
................................
Ladiesinwaiting Reform beingreborn in fluidsweet
for touch of fleshonflesh forgetting
from transform's fleshofall beyond denial&indulgence of self
throughflesh of carnalove with self itself becoming sandoftime
&lust for passion'sworship. with hourglass flowingfreely
Waiting waiting for chillingwestwind spinning topsyturvy
carring cacao&chillipepper's cruelconcoction throughpassion'spanting
to warmbeings of graveindifference. &deep slowbreathing
of carnallove of carnalife
Such a witch thiswind with apparition within in life of eternall
blowing breathoflife into villageofdamning beyondrefrain
damned&dying. of me restrainingme
from sugarsweetglee
Howshall AllHoly appear to allpious ? being hotchocolate confection
As stolidhistorian of transform'sperfection.
or
ecstatic chocolatiere? LetJesus drinkwine&sing
Let marriagemeld hardenedbody
Howshalltransform permeate crustedcenturies with calcifiedmind
of self petrified by selfdenial? thusbeginning truesuffering
of a Christforsaken.
With blow&flow of river
bringinglife of an alienkind Bubblinglava cooled
caneach piouself openbody&mind then smoothed by eon's showers
to thisnow drivendeep intoyears? now sunlit&pooled.
MartinLuther FallenShort
"A saint knows all his behavior is ego" We'veallsinned
that "chronic moral torment is the sign in our selfishseparation
of God's grace." &fallenshort of the
glorylessness
Luther'sprayer: of
"Here I stand, Godlessness
I can do no other, while lackingfortitude
God help me. to traintostillness.
Amen."
Church
Heavenhelp believers. Pulling in nearmidnight on oldgravelroad
There're goingtoneedit. between new grammarschool &church centuries old.
No childrenplaying no parishoners praying
Looming notnow under moonlessky starrycold.
Howcan I value
springblossoms Churchbuilding buffered by itsbest thoughtlesspart
whenpromisedeternity a graveyard full of lifebeyondeath.
in seasonlessEden? Schoolbuilding circling church'swarmheart
with playground of life dancing deathlessbreath.
Howcan I love
with heavenlooming Church&state by road bisected
eachthis eachnow never tomix one'sfaith with one'sfact.
lost to perfection's Twoways of loving with wallserected
effulgence? teachingourchildren thisfromthat.
Forgetting deathlesswhen Walls&fences between father&son
forgiving breathlessthen between heaven&earth between me&you.
becomingtransform's God'slaws&sapien's both righteous with blight
transientbeing eternal strifeboth in internecinefight.
noteven defendingagainst
nothing. Confusion onthis starrynight
between tworoads eachlit sobright
BurningBush of faith&reason each equallydeep
Each burningbush a Eucharistsoul eitheroad insuffient for mybeing tokeep.
Octoberbreezefanning each leaflame ....................................
bringingtomind fate'scruelestwist Sittingalone in lonelycar
with November rain denudingallblame. stabbedbycold ofeach cuttingstar
bleedingmyfather whilebeing hisboy
Trees toobare &barrenlives fauxpraying self'sdeath beourlast finalploy.
lyingscattered across crimsoncolored lawn
blowing&blown piled&burned
foodforthought each facelesspawn
livingforever in faithfuldawn.
**PopCorn**
Beginning inline begetting wellspentime Whilelost in superlarge carbonationmist
trading commonplace lucre for an uncommon dine attackingpopcorn with handmade intofist
on sutff of ourheritage an Americantreat but with delicategrip asif beingkissed
createdbycorn inits meeting with heat. before softcurvedwhiteseeds are feltby wetlips.
Handed over as mountain at an angle bonechilling Crushedmelted both/& whilewithin mymouth
piledwaytoohigh an invitationtospilling savoredsolong before beingsentsouth
my firstjob quiteclear tosave whitefromfate then washingaway with sugarsoda swill
of tumblingtofloor tobecrushed ¬ ate. leaving emptymouthwaiting for mynext until.
............................................
From tonguetouchtoodainty tofinger tofist Soitgoes in scoop&swallow
ritualbeginning so no kernels aremissed. till giantboxfinally ringinghollow
Speaker emerging unspoken fullmoist yetstill only halfwaythrough prescientpreviews
extractingwithadhesion being pickupsticks hoist. knowing they'll throwin some mainfeature reviews.
Justaswithserpent sniffing preylaced air Havingchosen to sprint for my free refill
unforkingmyfeeler picking eachkernel sofair knowingmyreturn wouldn'tbe withoutspill
dislodgingeachpuzzlepiece from highdomedpuffyfeast trailing softwhitesight in earnestflight
allbefore leavingcounter with prized husk&beast. whileflying hall&aisle without a bite.
Mountain atlastleveled ransomhavingbeenpaid Landingintime to search&find
largedrink graspedfirmly a benignbalance made mymate within headottedark
with both bubbly&burst satinghunger&thirst where wewatch &eat in passion'scoolheat
headingtosit in screamdark of screenbright. sharing hotseed in our prelude tolark.
God'sExcuses
Lousytranslation.
Literalinterpretation.
Empty Father
Emptyhands as Everyone wants a father
devil'sworkplace. but willsettle for a savior.
Emptyhead as Mothers arefor milquetoasts
workplace of gods in cultures of titsuckling cowards.
&self
each in pseudo Fathers mustbe distant silent
survival. brutal infallible.
Letmeconjure lifeternal Our mothers mustbe forgotten
before dirtyingmyhands being milk of humanmisunderstanding.
with love.
Our savior mustbe sacrificed
Higher &withhim memory of father
(Thanks E.Dickinson.) so allthat'sleft
Ofcourse myGod is higherthanme is whatwasthere allalong
HIs etherealbeing my gravity. a lonely scaredboy
wanting a father
Hisheaven isup. Mydoubt isdown. but settlingfor
Histhrone a smile. Mystool a frown. a savior.
So I mustwait for mysoul torise Immortality
tojoin Hisbeing beyondourskies Supernaturalbeing
after sheddingweight of mycellsuit of lies not necessarilyimplying
toascend towhere alldoubt surelydies. a supernaturalbeing.
(But canlovebe without lovingeyes?) Letmeindulge in mysticism
whilemaintaining my superior atheism
Monks notneedingGod toget what I want
"Monks should lead the mind in my privatereality of desire'sfulfilled.
inside the body and hold it there."
Gregory of Palamas (circa 1340) If alongmyway I happentoforget
then letmecontinue mypirouette
Homeatlast from perhaps dizzying beyondcomprehension
hope despair whileliving in nearlyperfect attention.
damage repair
myway unfair.
Death
Havingwandered solong Onlyself whosebeing is memory
within mystic air feelsdeath as time'sarrow
havingsent myself where I ismysoul divine&eternal.
on a willfulldare
comehome&behold Dizzy within transform'sgyre
wherethere is onlycare lesself dervishdancingwiththisnow
comehome to lesself's till rollingonthefloor laughing.
emptied nowhere.
Rendering
(Thanks MaryBakerEddy.)
"Jesus urged the commandment, Whichcouldbepretended:
'Thou shalt have no other gods before me,' Lesselfbeyond
which may be rendered: sin as separation
Thou shalt have no belief being godless willess meaningless hopeless
of life as mortal..." allbeing thisnow withoutspace outoftime
within elementalbeing.
Whichmaybe rendered: ............................
Thou shalthave Speakingintongues a guarantee of
nolife as mortal as a god inmybelief. divinity? insanity? divineinsanity?
Whichmaybe rendered: Should I believe?
Thou shalthave Should I follow?
immortality ouysidelife withineach Should I lead?
eternalmoment. Should I run?
Whichmabybe surrendered: (Don'tblame me.
Thouart thouless MaryBaker started it.)
entire beinglesself as emptiedperfection.
ComingUnknownUnloved
Comingunknown tothose whoknow. Comingunknown tothose whoknow.
Comingunloved tothose wholove. Comingunloved tothose wholove.
Needingsin as separation Needingtoforget I am an other
inorder toknow an other inorder tobecome a lover
withwhom He couldfind His self. withinwhom I canlose myself.
Such wasGod's dilemma Such is mydilemma
beingAll &infinitelyalone. pulsingpart seekingwhole.
Such is God'sfate Such is myfate
to neverlive to neverdie tolive todie withtraining
to neverlove. tolove.
Worshipping Zebras
Worshipping being subtle alchemy of sin In a worldofcolor
separating sodiumfromchlorine. whydidGod makezebras?
Worshipping asif obeisance a win Perhapsforportraiture
while destroying salt of heaven'searth. enhancedlook some say
by shadesofgray.
Theology curlingup within thoughtsoul
pretending aspart I can becomewhole. Perhaps for truth
tobestark or false?
Dancing God'sdance
singing God'songs Perhapsforwords
within harshstrictures tobark frompage?
of avowed rightswrongs.
........................... PerhapsHeforgot
With universewhirling through myself Hispalette thatday?
BigBangbecoming astronomer'sbirth. ..................
With psychologyswirling inmyhead Hoofbeats of zebras
memorywallowing in desire'smirth inworld of horses
withlesself worshippingnothing as dailybread. testing both hearing&unknowing.
Knowingmyunknowing In B&W UmayC choice
then begging to notknow or paintparrots &clownfish
spacetime an illusion asyou rejoice.
self an emptyshow.
Gettinglost onpurpose
butnever above
&neverever sofar
fromgrounding inlove.
Denied. Remaining. First as millipede. Actingoneachthought. Streamside muskrat dead.
Embraced. Battlebeginning. Afterpractice centipede. Shovelingsnow in summer. Dominating summerscents
In war. Perfection. Finally welltrained snake. Rakingleaves in spring. with his finalform.
Beneathgreen&lush Beneathgreen&lush Beneathgreen&lush
lyingdry withoutafuss lyingdry withoutafuss lyingdry withoutafull
havinghad its day. havinglived its life. unknowing lifedeath.
Interrupted sit. Lookingforanswer Evenbutterflies Vine coilinginbreeze
Needingtowrite my insight. for lineofdriveway birdpoop. avoiding dense dellgrowing growing into greenunknowing
Thenback to breathing. Lookingup at wire. going to meadow. beingall lifedeath.
Hearingbellsringing Hearingbellsringing Hearingbellsringing
knowing it'stime to worship rememberingmytraining hearing crownsongbirds singing
summoningmywill. rememberingchoice. &breeze throughtheirtrees.
Yellowbutterfly Nothavingdemons? Season'sconfusion Baby tuliptree
flitting over dryclover No. Learning todance withthem. onethird flushred twothirds green stillsporting herbaceoustem
flaunting its splendor. That's enlightenment. garden inbetween. with adultsizedleaves.
Bothsquirrels longone Bothsquirrels longone Bothsquirrels longone
almostall Hickorynuts. almostall Hickorynuts. almostall Hickorynuts.
Stillsomeleaves untouched. Stillsomeleaves ignored. Stillsomeleaves drying.
UnLoving TinyGods
It'sbeensaid by sapiens wiserthanme (Thanks Hafiz.)
that powercorrupts. Tinygods largegods
God is omnipotent yourgod mygod
therefore THEGOD.
God is corrupt.
Helpme choosewisely
It'sbeensaid by sapiens wiserthanme helpme choosetruly
that there's nothingbetterthan helpme choosefromamong
an absenceofgoodness. stars sky
God is omnibenevolent &
therefore myinfinitewhy
there's nothingbetterthan Iamchoosing atall.
an absenceofGod. .....................
Chosing withoutlosing
The GoodBook says knowledge is sorrow. preciouself inmychoices.
God is omniscient
therefore Talkingwhilewalking
God is allsorrow. neverhearing thisnow'svoices.
Logiciansnote that presence implieseparation Is thatecho me or you?
&wesapiens havefaith in logic. Are weone or are we two?
God is omnipresent
therefore Inchoosing alwayslosing
God is complete separation. mylastchance to train.
Some suggest that separation is sin Prison
originalsin primalsin oppositeoflove. Religion
God is separatefromsapiens culture's prisongang
therefore protection at highcost
God is sin by inhalingexhaust
infinitelyselfish of machinery of self.
intimatelyunloving.
Concrete
Salvation WalkingHisway on aggregatearth
Salvation as salivation unfirmfooting on smallsmoothstone
conditionedresponse theonlyway I'vewalked sincebirth
to theonlyway I'veverknown.
unconditionedstimuli
desiringtoensconce one's Walkingmypath through sandsoftime
preciouself sinking with eachstep before it'solid
asif to reify ifnot to deify choosingmypath makingitmine
my bleedingheart soul struggling onmyway so stolid.
with eternalife my goal.
Walkingtheway fromdust throughdust
Prettyclever. on stones&sand &powderedcement.
Becoming ghost in windygust
Whenwordsconspire till steadyrain revealingintent.
weneedtoinqire
into meaningbeyond Drivenrain drying to solidbase
merecoincidence. for
transform'seternal crosscountryrace.
In thiscase itsclear
wemust letgo ourfear Just fourfiftysix of drooling &theoldcock is crowing.
before we awaken. Soon sparrows&wrens.
**InTheFuture - 1**
(Thanks GeorgeCarlin.)
1. All mediation willbedone 11. Each thirdTuesday of months of
in the LilyPad position. fiveorfewer letters
2. All facsimilies of Buddha will comealive enlightenment willbediscounted
&argue over doctrine. to merelyfour koans solved.
3. Suffering willbe eliminated &the 12. Some codingwizard will create an
first NobleTruth will become algorithm for solving koans
"All life is boring." but noone willbeable to figureitout.
4. The EightFoldPath willmatewith 13. Both the Rinzai &Soto pathstoenlightenment
the TenCommandments with willbejudged by the MiddleWaySchool
the offspring beingcalled tobe extremistdoctrines unworthy of disciples.
"TheEighteenUnFoldedSuggestions". 14. One's OriginalFace willbeduplicated
5. Meditation willbedone &sold at kiosks inthemall.
onlyduring commercials. 15. The firstwo NobleTruths willbe changed to
6. Karma willbetraded like a. Buylow.
a. baseballcards b. Sellhigh.
b. mutualfunds 16. Karma willbe a syrup to drool on icecream.
c. trophyspouses 17. Cause&Effect willbediscoveredtobe
7. All desires willbemet Effect&Cause &useless in a universe
but in a darkalley in the of Transform'sGyre.
badside of town. 18. Self willbe a costlyoption availiable
8. Yourpast canbechanged to parents uponbirth of eachchild.
butonly your twoclosestfriends 19. An extendedlifetime warranty willbe
will know it. included at noextracost if you
9. The DiamondSutra willbecut into buy the undercoating for yourbeing.
seventeen smallgems each with 20. EternalSoul will be a discount shoe
seventeensyllables. outlet that givesaway freepasses on
10. Whiledoing walkingmeditation at night on your next foursins on anypurchase
allmonks willwear dayglo gowns of $50 or more.
with a reflectingbelt.
Sequence
Havingbeenborn of flesh&bonefather Chimneynarrowed intime by creosotecreed
havinglived a life as toohuman son houseigniting smokedriving believers outside.
it'seasy tosee why sequence thoughbackwards Dambursting onpurpose for powerof flow
seemstoflow from Father toSon to TheOne extinguishingflame of faith thathad died.
........................................
with GodFatherpatriarch as architect Homeless faithless lesselfbeing
JesusForman with planstodirect sittingbystream in smolderingclothes
I as worker constructingmylife atlast divinginto clearcold unknowing
asif Spirit unneeded inmy busyneglect. emergingtomerge with faintmist asitblows
Eachnail inmyhouse a nail inmycross till allthat'sleft of thathouse neverhome
whilebuilding a tower of myprivateBabel. are ashestoashes FathertoSon
Fillingeachroom with neverforgetting & a clear&present emptiednow
increasingpower of myprivatefable. lesself having grown from unholyone.
..................................
Living from Father toSon toSpirit Sittingsilently by sereneriver's side
without a feel for transform'swhole sequencetooclear tosayorshow.
sleepingdays dreamingnights Each spawnofbeing a self&son
with purposenarrowed to onedualgoal GodFather dimming in dawndustglow.
to protectmyself from breadthofallbeing
from my homesickneed facingheaven'sheight From allife toson whobirthed hisFather
to securemy I in myattic of ration comfortingchild throughstorms of self
with remnantsofpast inthat dusty dimlight. comes fullyformedsapien to fullness of life
in fullfeelings firstcoming
ClingingtoFather with fury of faith tobeing's fullwealth.
neverfullybecoming son whomIam.
Livinginhouse of myfear of HisWhole Wish
drinking stagnantwater fromblocked stormdam. Distractingmyself
from my inevitable end
Tillfinally myhouse becomingtomb for HisSon longenough perhaps
withFather a picture over smokinghearthfire. that forabrief instant or two
Withwords leadingdeeds factsfailing as truth I'd forget its all distraction
Spiritburningfaint on unforgiven heartpyre. from certainty of
this eternalnow.
Existential Irony SuperMan
GodFather demandingdevotion What I count as SpiritualWish
(my earnestattachment) is simplebeing when less selfish
to attain thatwhich canobtain something biggerthan
(but neverbe attached) notneeding tobe superman
only throughlesself but merely beingwith anyother.
lost in transform'sgyre.
Asif beingwith oneother being Earth.
Communion (I with Thou) Asif beingwith twothers being Air.
or union (I lostwithinallother). Asif beingwith threeothers being Water.
Asif becoming allother in GalacticFire
Makeup yourmind'sface as elementalbeing
but becertain your mascara within transform'sgyre
doesn'tmelt in lesself's nebularheat ....................
with gravitysparking a newgalaxy Beingborn headfirst as amnioticreation
(withoutmyexpresswrittenconsent) developing thirst for lesseparation.
inwhich you have My privatebubble havingburst
faintpulse beingleft in abjectisolation
impossiblylittleseparation praying for supernatural romance
neverever thenwhen to lead me in life's elementaldance.
& thisnow
is gone. Perhapsbetter a breechbirth
landingsolidly feetfirst
Glass within earthairwaterfire.
Volcanicsand's firetofreeze
or blowntotransparency asif toplease **ReIncarnation**
each tooreverent fool. Reincarnation?
Really? Reincarnation!
Staininglass asif sacredstories beproof
of lifebeyond (butnot for me) After eternities trying to still
language'slock &intellect'skey. my originalcarnation?
Staining more&more You've got tobe kidding.
ofthestuff of ocean'shore
makingclearcrystal PowerOf
into chromaticgristle "...religion should help you live with
asif rainbow's canoccur questions for which there are no answers...
without rain. the Buddha looks at the suffering world...
.............. and spends the next 40 years tramping
Windowless walless around trying to find a cure for the
abode of exhaustedwanderer suffering of the world."
forgetting to feardeath
needing nodisplays for distraction. Devil'spower both subtle&relentless.
MidNight ChristmasEve
Baptismalchores&holywars Childlike religious tourdeforce
putaside for frigid seasonalwhores of sinkinghopes &lamentations.
selling BodyOfBodies whollyincarnte Bearing eachseason burying eachsunset
buying purelove with a promiseofhate with crosscorpse bearing driedfruit of salvation.
againstallinfidels &sanctimoniousboors Forsaken eachseason in righteous vanity
pelting glasspulpits bloodying brasspreachers forsaken by His final plaintiveshout
against allothers intheir sanctifiedtours "WhyhastThou forsakenMe?"
of Christglass houses with Godapproved teachers. then livingon by livingwithout
................................... baptismalchores &Holywars
SantaGodwalking fromfire onfire infidels&sanctimoniousboors
to ornatetree uprooted&dying guilt&shame&SantaGod's pain
addingfear to season of guilt&shame with crossestobear for ChristClause insane.
with ourchildren dearchildren emptyheaded&crying. .........................
Spiritcycle complete nonbelieving replete
ChristClause slidingdown ourchimney with care with hopeabandoned &faith'sconceit.
with His infinite bagofcrosses tobear
foreach tohang from our fireplace mantel Transformdancing to eternity'sbeat
infront of cutree dryingindespair. for thosefew in trainingfor seasonlessleep.
NotRight
It's justnotright But then youneed Plague onallbeings of knowledgeorfaith
growing allovertheplace. to pollinatebyhand visiting sapiens payingtheirdues
Morelikeweed thancrop. water duringdrought &penitents intheir hardhewnpews
Can'tmakemeal or money withthat. fertilize &fightbugs eachbeing straightnarrow &unyielding.
(they'redrooling
Lookswild. Iswild. to feedon your Faith planted waytooshallow.
And it'sbeenhere awhile. newcrop). Hope becoming field gone fallow.
It loveswind &canweather Plaintive prayer if heard atall
longdroughts &has Wind&rain comes hard answered with a resounding "No".
cometoterms with bugs. whenitcomes.
The oldplants didn'tjust But somewild but welltrained faithlessfew
But youcan't eat it wither or washout. growingnativecrops in noGarden of Eden
notfruit notflower within earthairfirewater rendezvous
notstem notroot. Guess that'stheprice for cultivation. honoring transform's elementalbeing.
Youcan't makeit intothread We've gotalota mouthstofeed
or boil it fortea &foodcomesfirst. Thosefewfearless creativefarmers
&itcertainly won'tmakebread. ..................... judgedguilty as neverevercharged
Thencame storms for flauntingeccentricty
Need to squareoff this acerage drought in fervorofconformity
cut stumps &hauloffdebris. wind nowsentenced to lovingsentience.
Need to clearocks. erosion ################
pests&alltherest Owl's unyeilding tease
The turnunder thoseweeds with nature administering holdingnight agains dawnsongs
&startover withseeds in neatrows. its harshest test. till soft morningbreeze.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Castingintobrush Castingintobrush Castingintobrush knowing worm&fish willwait knowing worm&fish willwait knowing worm&fish willbe retrievingtoosoon. practicingpatience. withme forever.
When I stopcussing When I stopcussing When I stopcussing
at my online pokerhands at my online pokerhands at my online pokerhands
then I'll alwayswin. then I'll neverlose. Jacks will laughwithme.
I know who I am Mypain is theirpain. Way tooclose tocall.
enjoying selfconsciousness I am root of myevil Unable toknow pleasure
itspleasures itspains. fruit of mypleasure. rarely causingpain.
Life as subtraction Life as addition Life as life is this.
fromstillness to lastaction frompulse to lastaccretion stillpulse pulsing still¬
&all inbetween. becoming obscene. in eachmoment's wean.
Don'tAsk
(PGA lettingplayer usecart.) JudgingGod'swill unacceptable Lettingmyjudgment shapeway of allother
Rules beingarbitrary are therefore sacrosanct. askingforus tohear Hisprayer making a god ofmy mercifulwish
Ifyoucan't walk alleighteen youcan't beranked thinking ourwill canmake a way never at one with perfection's suffering
amongthose whoaren't yourpeers. changingrules when lifefeels unfair. never losingself in reality'sbliss.
...................................
Let noact of God changewill of us Flyinginface of powers thatbe Asked eachprayer mustbe answered
compassion becoming desire'spimp. thinking therebe nopower thatis answer oftenbeing simply no.
Weepingwithfate while denyingfact beyondoureach beyondGod'stouch Loving wemust acceptallsuffering
making each self a moralgimp. no powerebeyond both ours&His. becomingone within transform'sflow.
LineCall Gate
Mathmindbitching imperfection of linecall GatelessGate guarded by GodFather GodSon
asif perfectsystem couldproduce perfectmatch. inscription over our unreasonedfate
Onlyinheaven of pride'sperfection reading quitesimply "ThyWillBeDone".
would eachballslow to clearlyshow
if linewastouched ornot. ThyWill making mywill lessthan mywant
but morthan myneed to live&letdie.
(Evenplaying ifyouwish with lasermachine A life of lockstep in mindset of physics
notevery call perfectly cutdryclean.) living twothirds &living a lie.
If needingperfection tobe yourpartner Howcanone everbecome fullyChristian
&your eachdesire tobe truecall whilecaged in clockwork cause&effect
then tradereality of judgement'serr with completecorporeal chemicaldefence
makingyourpartner a practicewall. with neuralnexus nearlyperfect
a billiardballbody so fullofpain
JesusCan't below narrowedself with cuestickbrain?
Jesus can'tdoit forme or withme.
Winterwillcome winterwillpass Shootingpool for life hopingfordeath
withorwithoutme &/or Jesus. for passagebeyond CrossOfChrist
with Newton the cardshark bothGodHeads his shills
Let itsfreeze quietmyflailing. &everywhere an ephemeral willessGheist
Let itscold numbmy waggingtongue. untouchedbycuball this targetlesstarget
Let its ice slow mywanderinattention. untouchedby cuestick this godlessgod.
Then whenspringcomes &daffodil Thywill be billiards gamewithoutchance.
withorwithout Jesus &/or me Thywon't be wordless etherealdance
it'llbe interesting to finallysee throughgates unopenned unearthly unclosed
if I'm quiet silent still. pastcrosses at churches of graveyards theychose.
.....................................................
Faith Tablecontorted
Havingfaith in faithalone balls crumbling&pocked
with faith flyingproudly inface of reason cuestick gonelimp
being lessthantrue but morethanfalse billiardroom locked.
faith couldbeconstrued as selfishtreason ........................................................
Being almostChristian in timesofknowing
againstmypower to makesense of sensing is tobe inwind withoutfeeling itsblowing
shapingflow of sound&sight tobe anchoredinself in infiniteinertia
taste&touch&fragrancesweet always leadactor inmy strutting puppetshow.
all fillingshade with glowinglight.
Strungtight tomycross a marionette'sfate
Yetfaith in reason beyondallsense strugglingvainly in vanity belowheaven'sgate
is self writlarge to eyes shutight facingaudience facingbreeze
tooproud&defensive to let lifebe playingout mypride doingas I please.
sometimes day sometimes night
&tooearly &timeless Each childlikeChrist afraid of fatalstage
blindeye finallyblindless of nailingone'self tocross atgate
lesself taking noshape tosuffer&die in final roleplayed
beyondcross with nogate. beggingformercy until itstoolate.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Body
Body holding good&bad atbay Rememberhow youthought yougrew
with brain playingitsgame of anywhichway from one+one to almightytwo
of picking&choosing asif itwas free when Christ wouldsing a songwithyou
not rootoftrunk of eachbrancyh of mytree onyourway to heaven in a handbasket?
tillsleep freeingdemons
roamingwithoutreasons Pick&choosecarefully forgetting that three
through a mindscape is magicbeyond mind'smirroredme
masteredbynoone. &thecave I'vexplored in memory
..................... becomingtomb of daylightdark.
Choosingwisely what I wish I knew
whenliving the lie of false&true Darkestnightshining radiantlight
so moments of self's perceivedominion with guardsbeingbribed by body'sbride
willbe wellwilled pure truebloodblue. with ectasypromised in lesself'sreunion
with thatwhich was neverever apart.
Language wellearned perfectration nowearned ............................
my dreamingwakelife beigh birthofalldead Mybody holding good&bad atbay
in hellfireheat of fission. whilelearning love'slanguage &how to notsay
I chooses thidthat fromeach when&wherever
Eachword of knowing eachfact sotrue with cellsbeating realpulse of lifebeyondnever.
inmyworld mybrain so expertlydrew
thatkeen cunningdemon Languageunlearned lesselfglimpse finallyearned
roamingfree with goodreason mywakingdream lost as memoryisburned
through a mindscape masteredbyme. in heaven'sfire of heatofusion.
................................
No God orsun or SonofGod
but snowcloudmoon a wink a nod
Comingwaytooclose Ripplingred pondclouds &friendly freedemons
losingallpower to judge with sunsetting fishrising roamingwithout reasons
whilelearningtolove. shadowgeese gliding. through transform's elementalbeing
nonmastered by noone.
CONTINUED ON GLOSSARY 1 - 2
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